04/05/2013

Oh hey

Look at that. Phil isn't the only one who can hack. Fucking weak password. Anyway, my recommendation to you, Sanna, is not to eat food from strangers (FUCKING KELEVRA? HOW FUCKING STUPID CAN YOU BE BEFORE YOU JUST DIE OF NOT KNOWING TO BREATH?). as for your mystery admirer, I'm betting it's a proxy, who's just waiting to kill you. After all, you've got to let meat rest just after you've roasted it, or the juices all run out at once and then you just have horrible dry meat. yuck.

Anyway, that advice goes to whoever did kidnap poor little Sanna. I'd also recommend cooking each joint separately, to better fit into the regular oven. Given that people taste a lot like pork, rubbing some salt into the skin could give you some nice crackling, or at least help to flavour the fat and meat deep down. Another technique is to layer over the meat with some bacon (sorry, not sure where to get bacon off a human) to help keep it moist and juicy.

Anyways, to the point. Since I'm gonna be stuck here for a while, and watching the cameras doesn't interest me much (not sure how Phillip keeps it up. he's a bit of an odd one), I'm going to help you out of your little pickle. I don't recommend pickling people, it just doesn't work so well. Smoking or Salting is a better idea. And less likely to make the victim drown early.

Anyway, all this blogging has made me hungry. good thing the fridge was full on friday.

4 comments:

  1. Yay cannibalism =D

    I must ask why in the world would you want to eat a runner? No offense guys but being on the run, sleeping in alleyways, and such I doubt runners taste that good. Also all the work you would have to do to clean must be a pain in the ass.

    If Runners are your source of food you need to rethink your life. Hell, I'm surprised you haven't died from illness. Just go after clean people like the other cannibals

    I'm going to hell for this comment.

    More serious note; pHIL you might want to research a way to prevent access to your warehouse through the Path.

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    1. It'll be pointless trying to contact Philip for a few hours, maybe the rest of the day. The stress was just too much for him, poor lad. And the fact is, eating runners serves two purposes; it stops them trying to kill you, and it's a nice gamey meat.

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  2. Is this Craft, by any chance?

    Meh, say what you like. All I hear is this [link].

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    Replies
    1. This is craft, and if you'd get the fuck over yourself for a couple minutes you'd realise I'm going to help you. Bitch.

      Delete